This little beauty entered our family a few weeks ago and boy was I surprised.
I was about 98% sure we were having another boy. There was no reason to think otherwise. After 3 boys, that is just what we did, we had boys. That is what I knew and expected. This pregnancy wasn’t any different than the rest. I wasn’t any sicker, I didn’t break out, etc. So there was no reason for me to believe that the outcome would be any different than the rest of them.
According to the ancient Chinese conception calendar it was a boy. Even my uncle’s wooden pigeon feather that he uses to tell the gender of rolling pigeons eggs said it was a boy. Who am I to go against the voodoo pigeon feather?
Any of the old wives tales that I did all said it was a boy. They were wrong.
I looked through a name book while I was pregnant. I got all the way through the boy section. When I tried to look at the girl names it just felt off. I wasn’t interested so I stopped. I think I made it through the B’s before I figured it was a waste of my time.
I planned on buying a boy outfit and a girl outfit and making a boy blanket and girl blanket to bring to the hospital so we would have something to bring the baby home in. I went to Target and chose a girl outfit that I liked okay. It wasn’t the cutest thing I’ve ever seen but it was fine. And I was pretty sure I would be returning it anyway. I couldn’t decide on a boy outfit. I ended up coming home with two because neither was perfect and I just couldn’t decide between them. I figured I’d return the one we didn’t use. I returned them both.
I went to the fabric store to get some fabric for a girl blanket. I ended up coming home with fabric for a boy blanket even though I already had some at home that I had planned to use. Even though there is only about 3/4’s of a row of boy fabric and 3 rows of girl fabric I couldn’t find any girl fabric that I loved. In the end I bought some outdoor/camping theme fabric that had pink and purple in it. Not real feminine.
I made the boy blanket first. I spend some time on it and quilted it with special stitches. It turned out well and I was happy with it. I barely finished the girl one. I had decided not to finish it but when I didn’t have the baby on 12-12-12 like I wanted to I figured I had some more time to work on it and I might as well finish what I started. At least then it would be ready to give to whomever I knew that had a girl next.
And then we were at the hospital. Fourteen minutes after we got there she was born. My midwife knew we didn’t know the gender and let my husband made the announcement.
It was a girl.
When I looked down to check for myself the umbilical cord was between her legs. I wasn’t sure that there wasn’t a penis there. I had to change her diaper later just to see for myself.
Over the next two days we were in the hospital, I caught myself thinking how weird it was when the nurses said “her” or “she” when referring to my baby. I still find myself, weeks later, sometimes thinking “him” when thinking about her, especially in the middle of the night.
This baby girl will definitely change things around here. We have pink in our house and will have to get some new toys. I can no longer say “the boys” or “my boys” when I’m referring to my kids anymore. And I am learning how to tie those little ribbon bows. But I know that is how it is supposed to be.
One night shortly after we got home from the hospital I went into each of the kids rooms and watched them sleep. While in one of their rooms I felt an overwhelming sense of peace. This is our family. I don’t know if that means that we won’t have any more kids but it doesn’t matter to me. For the first time I am content with us just the way we are.
2 thoughts on “Surprised”
This post is beautiful. You are such a good writer. Wish I could meet your new little one. Love and miss you!
It’s fun to see you blogging on here again. I hope that means you are finding time to do anything more than feed babies/kids and change diapers. We want to come see this baby. B is just getting over a cold so I’ll call you in a few days.